Thursday, July 24, 2014

WRITERS WRITE... WRITING PARTNERS FEUD ~ We Are Liars





Sometimes, in our work, we lie.  Well, actually not sometimes, but mostly.  That is what fiction is all about, speculating on the possibilities whether they are real or not.  The characters are made up, the plots are straight from the Fibersville, USA, situations blossom like real looking silk flowers shoved into the ground and fertilized with Miracle Grow.  Stories are a wickedly wonderful fabrications brought to you by liars.  Embellishment, invention, innovation, hyperbole, and exaggeration are tools used in this deceitful world of storytelling. A tall tale often is a takeoff from a kernel of truth.  We can tell a variety of lies, stretch them out beyond Pluto the planet (note the lie) and beyond.  What we can't do is deny the emotional behavior of our characters.  There are truth that are part of our humanity, and if we stray from those truths without explanation, our lies become obvious rather than transparent.  That's why we adore writing fiction, the bliss of creating what we want from whatever we want.  Such freedom! 

Z:  Plus, you don't have to remember what anyone actually said.
A:  You said it, my memory just isn't what it used to be.  But when I complained to the doctor about not being able to remember where I put the car, where I'm going, and what I was supposed to do when I got there, he wasn't much help. I asked him, what could I do?  And he responded.  "Pay me in advance."
Z:  (Grins)   Pinocchio moment.
A:  Astute my fine penning friend. 
Z:  So, you are proclaiming to the world we are liars.
A:  Yes, and do you know what happens to liars when they die?
Z:  Yup, they lie still.
A:  Ha... ha...
Z:  Hey, that was a good one.
A:  A good one is, A lie is an abomination unto the Lord and an ever present help in time of trouble. 
Z:   And what's that got to do with the price of castor oil in the Himalayas?
A:  Based upon a nice foundation of truth, lying brings fiction to life.
Z:  Did I tell you that my cousin got in trouble for calling someone a liar.
A:  Whoa, no you didn't.
Z:  Oh yeah, he was asked by his supervisor if he called his foreman a liar, and he said, "You bet I did."  Then he was asked if he called said foreman, stupid.  My cousin replied, "Oh yeah, right to his face."  Finally the supervisor asked if he called him an opinionated, egomaniac, gator-faced bleep-bleeper.  (Zi took a moment to sip his freshly warmed coffee)
A:  Well, did he?
Z:  No, but he asked that it be written down so he could remember it.
A:  (Does the irritated lady hair flip [which is kinda difficult since she has short hair] and ignores him.)  Despite being liars, we have to be logical about it. 
Z:  (Lips twitch as he fights a laugh) 
A:  (Eyes narrow) Are you saying I am not logical?
Z:  I have said nuthin', nuthin.  (He imitates the Germany accent of Sergeant Shultz from an old TV sitcom)
A:  As I was saying, even when writing fantasy or science fiction there are truths one must follow.  You can't have a water giant living on a planet of fire.  If you have characters traveling through space via a spaceship you have to figure out the what and how as close to something that is believable as possible.
Z:  And when being told the check is in the mail, one must chuckle.
A:  Huh?
Z:  Just thinking about how there are so many cliché lies.
A:  Yes... like... of course I love you.
Z:  Or... (Looks pointedly at Angelica)  You get this one, I'll pay next time.
A:  Are you implying I'm cheap?
Z:  It's not the money, it's the principle of the thing.
A:  But we can still be good friends?
Z:  (Nods)  Ah, you followed that lying thread nicely. 
A:  Thank you, it is what I do.  One of my fav lies is, don't worry, I can go another 20 miles when the gauge is on "empty."
Z:  Or don't worry, he's never bitten anyone.
A:  The best, I'll call you later.
Z:  Even better, I've never done anything like this before.
A:  The all time, groaner of a lie... (Drums the desk with pencils)  I'm from your government, and I am here to help you.
Z:  So, what you are saying is that it is a good thing to lie.
A:  Only in fiction.
Z:  And when you tell your eighty-five year old Aunt Sally that her blue hair looks wonderful.
A:  It does look wonderful on her.  (Chin lifts with indignation)  Aunt Sally reads our column.
Z:  Sorry, Aunt Sally. 
A:  And that is no lie. 




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Angelica Hart and Zi ~ Vixen Bright and Zachary Zane
www.champagnebooks.com - www.carnalpassions.com - angelicahartandzi.com